Dreams

I saw Waking Life following Tibe’s suggestion. The film is about one guy’s dream. He goes around talking to different philosophers about different philosophical issues. I found the discussions very catching. The discussion I liked most happens around the end whn one of them speaks about how there is no time and that there is just one moment, now – which is also eternity. The soundtrack was the best! I’m going to get it.

It was a lucid dream he was having, meaning he knew he was dreaming. I wish I was able to do that! I spoke to a friend of mine who said he always knows when he’s dreaming.  !. Anyone here with the same experience?! It was interesting to read about ways of how you can test if you’re dreaming – turning the light switch off for example (lights won’t go out in dreams). There is a couple of problems with that though. Let’s say I’m doing a presentation and I make an embarrassing mistake. In the hope that I’m dreaming, do I go to the corner of the room and turn the light switch off?! If the lights go out and so not a dream, I might as well sneak out and throw myself from the top of a building. Hopefully the results of the light switch test were wrong and I’d wake up just before hitting the ground! (If the lights don’t go out though I can just laugh at the audience, mua ha ha ha ha, and fly away). I could also be in a field where there’s no light switch. Besides, whenever I’m dreaming I’m very occupied, doing things that require focus, like running away from a dog, arguing with someone, or falling down from a cliff. Certainly not the time to look for a light switch! Other times I may be happy with what’s going on so I’d rather not know I’m dreaming.

There is another test.

It’s to see a digital watch. Apparently digital clocks look fuzzy/unclear inside dreams. I don’t have a digital watch but I do carry a phone that I constantly look at. So my plan now is to make it a habit to ask myself if I’m dreaming. I will then pop out my phone to see the time. Hopefully I will remember to do the same in my dreams.

Actually what’s important here is not really what method I choose to use. I just need to get into the habit of asking myself if I’m dreaming. I think it’s easy to tell as long as I remember to ask the question. I mean come on, I have even dreamt of going to elementary school with my flip flops on. I don’t need a watch to tell me I’m dreaming – the whole idea of going back 20 years and going to school with flip flops is craaaaazy. There are tricky ones though where I want to run but my legs feel too heavy to move, or I want to shout but no sound comes out.

Why do I want to do all this? Because I think flying is fun! I’ve also found myself playing some very nice tunes in my dreams, solving problems and so on. If I succeed in having a lucid dream I’m going to call one of you. I’ll do some mean things to you to test your true friendship. The possibilities are endless!

i am robbing my country blind

I am not trying to be self-righteous or anything like that or not like it. I just feel that I am getting paid more money than I have worked for. There is the salary, the top up, the position allowance, (until recently) extension and a couple of other things I have chosen not to accept. I could have settled for the salary only and even that I would think excessive. Do I have a lot of money on my hands at the end of the month and am I “planning for the future”?  That is another issue.

A while back on Addis Admass they were interviewing the guy who works at the Dagmawi Menelik Hospital morgue and I was shocked to learn that: after cutting open and sewing Lord knows how many corpses on a daily basis; having to puke every morning from the ghastly nature of the causes of death; working under conditions that could and do endanger his health – he goes home with 400 something birr come payday.

Some could argue that he is doing simple mechanical work and that people like me are in the more taxing “knowledge industry” and deserve to get more. Yet no argument could convince me that my work is 11 times harder than his.

So unfair.

I wish I could get hold of him and make some amends. Hey dawg! If you happen to be reading this-in case this be a day that people are not too busy dying-holla at me!

One

My overpaid ass just got out of class.

I don’t mean to brag or anything but… I can’t fucking help it!

I am telling you this because of the admirable way you put up with my whining and moaning about my teaching career. I am doing this for you.

A student asks me (after class) if I had kids and whether they did not miss me when I went to work. I tell him I have got a picture of one of my kids which I could show him if he would please follow me to the office. I show him the picture of one of my nieces and disclose her real identity. I ask him why the questions? Did he have in mind a chick whom I can hook up with (please let it be!)? He says him and the other students like the way I teach, especially the way I try to make them unwind by telling them stories. I reply, stories are good but the main thing is that I should succeed in transferring the necessary knowledge – so did he think I was doing that too? He says, yes! Yes he says!!! Did you hear that errbody?!

In your face, previous batch!

Well, I don’t really mean that. It was one of the points that I raised with the kid: told him that I thought I could have done a better job with his seniors, which I didn’t and take full responsibility for; and that the rumors about me having been a horrible teacher were based on a true story; and that I believed that there still was huge room for improvement.

It is all about improvement baby! And if you happen to be familiar with the lingo of the country’s newest edition of a five year strategy – transformation!

Now to the “Did you know?” section…

Did you know that I was responsible for naming the youngest of my nieces?! I think my being away from home held some sway over her parents’ decision to stick with my suggestion. People would be asking how they came up with the name and they would answer “ … her uncle is away on business … he came home the day after she was born ….” and I would join “ yes yes yeall!… I was chillin’, praying at the midnight Easter mass … and suddenly this angel I mean thought comes over me … and  there and then…”

And Blen is not a bad name after all. I mean, it is way better than some other names that start with a B; Bethlehem for instance 🙂

the fire is back; but inspiration…

Got my humble stove souped up after an epic wait of nearly two months. It ain’t been easy, I can tell you that: from frowning waitresses to losing my temper over delayed orders and staging a walk out; from washing, once a week, the plates on which I eat bread, margarine and marmalade – no tea or coffee but a water by my side, how sad! – to a heavy rotation of eateries; from wishing-during the first weeks of its absence- for it to come back home safe only soon to dread the day they finally tell me that it is ready and I can take it home; to writing unintelligible  sentences with ungodly punctuation…

I slugged it out through it all and now,  I would like to take this opportunity to say – fuck what everyone else says! Fossil fuels go hard!!

I hope my yellow buddy brings along with it better mornings because my mornings are depressing. I wake up in the morning and immediately embark upon reflections of my life as an exercise in futility. At that moment nothing, not even my “happiest” moments, seem to be worth anything.  I am in the shower, and bless it, an inspiration, a life purpose, starts to take form in the deepest recesses of my head. What is this inspiration?

A towel, a towel! All my kingdom for a towel!

My day starts to take shape from there on out until it reaches a crescendo-sleep sweet sleep!

One

One should start to suspect that one’s life is  sucky when one’s  goal in life is cellulose. Maybe this is about those people who look at me up and down and then up, see what I am wearing, and think (I can hear you! :mad:) that I am unfit to be a teacher. Yes I agree with you – I am unfit; but for a different reason.

wordpress statistics
%d bloggers like this: