The (over)thinker; አካብዴ tendencies. አስቴር አወቀ

No blasphemy but I am not crazy about Sundays.

Cooking finally done, I have told her that I would call after shower. After her, I sure wouldn’t mind calling my friend from Ohio (ቃለ መጠይቆች ምናምን ላይ ሰዎች እንዲህ ማለት ለምን አስፈለጋቸው? “…አንድ ወዳጄ ነበር:: አሁን ያለው አውስትራሊያ ነው:: …” አሁን ወዳጅህ የት እንዳለ አሁን ማን ጠየቀህ?! Degmo you know that ኤፍሬም እንዳለ story: ሰርግ ላይ የእንኳን ደስ አላችሁ መልዕክት ሲተላለፍ “…ቲቲ ከዲሲ ቸብ ቸብ ቸብ ዳኒ ከዳላስ ቸብ ቸብ ቸብ አንሙት ክንዴ ከደባርቅ ሳሳሳሳሳቅ”) Then I get a text from my former roommate: “I sure wouldn’t mind Etyopian coffee with bread from Etyopia.” I’m pressed for time.

The time issue እንዳለ ሆኖ another thing that had me worried was the “bread from Etyopia” part. Of course I had made him coffee a couple of times before. But what if the bread part was a pun? You know, what if he is trying to make fun of our የዳቦ reputation, or the lack thereof? መቼም የሰው ነገር አይታወቅም:: God knows how other Africans make fun of us. መቼም አንዴ ስማችን ጠፍቷል:: እንደገናም እየጠፋ ነው This being a year when my people are starving, again. Not to mention my people  shooting my people {even children} on the head, again. ወሬው ሁሉ የሚያስፈራ እንዲል መዝሙሩ. Every now and then “Ethiopia” searches lead to unsavory jokes. (Etyopia is not in the Middle East mofos! I once sat next to this woman on a plane. Why do I mention that it was on a plane? Refer to a previous parenthesis. ብቻ she was telling me how she had plans to visit the apostolic route of Saint Paul; and how it was a pity that Palmyra had been destroyed and it’s a no go zone; were there any Roman ruins in Etyopia? አረ ባክሽ ሴትዮ! ጳውሎስ በኛ በኩል አልፎ አያውቅም. ድንገት ካየው ካንዬን ጠይቂው)

the_thinker_skeleton-8x6

I think the matter to death and finally settle on a reply: “… could you please come a little bit later… I got you fam, on the coffee…But the bread, you know we’ve been having that drought, man🙂 could be problematic.” If he was trying to be funny at our expense, I was trying to rob him of the joy by telling the joke myself.  Being proactive.

Well, cometh the hour, cometh the man, ግንድ የሚያህል ዳቦ ተሸከሞ:: I had not foreseen that. I try to save face, tell him I was joking. Show him the mad bread that I got. ከፈለግክ ቤግልም አለ:: እሺ የሚቀባ ምን ልስጥህ? Dude had used his own spreads before leaving home. Bread was good to go. He even told me that half of the bread was for me😀  በፍጹም  ኢትዮጵያዊ ይሉኝታ እምቢ አልኩ:: Keza I መጋበዝ him the on point rice I had made– በሞቴ! ከዛ ዓለም ዘጠኝ ሆነ:: ሩዝ ተበላ: ቡና ተጠጣ:: Current fellow African roommate joined in.  ጨዋታ ደራ  “…women complain about everything, everyday….you have to be tolerant…..village girls are more well-behaved than city girls…it’s difficult to be married and go to school at the same time… ” ናይጄሪያውያን ወንድሞቻችንን ደግሞ አማን😀

The previous day…

ውጭ አገር ላለው ሌላኛው ወዳጄ ገጠሬ እንዲህ አልኩት:

_20160410_231434

ሰለአስቴር ምንም የምጨምረው ነገር የለም:: ፍቅር ናት:: እግዚያብሄር ይባርካት:: One could never count her off. She manages to touch the heart almost every time; even with wishy washy songs like Wishy Washy😀

አቶ ገጠሬ. ሰለአስቴር ለመጻፍ ከፈለግክ እንዲህ ብለህ ትጀምር ዘንድ እመክራለሁ: “ሁሉንም ነገር የአዮዋው ወዳጄ ተናግሮ ጨርሶታል:: ግን አንዳንድ ነጥቦች ለማከል ያህል…”

Please make a certificate (like the one you provided last time😉 ) to the effect that I have hereby decided to transfer a year from the remainder of my life to Aster’s account. She deserves it.

One

New year, same old shtick, with slight modifications.

Wave after wave of ዕውቀት hitting me like the sea does rocks. Found a couple of hitherto undiscovered grey, nay, white hairs and couldn’t help but be amused, excited and worried all at the same time. As if the receding hair line, the vitamin and q tip packs I went through were not warnings enough…

Video

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. geTere
    Apr 20, 2016 @ 15:40:07

    ያባት ስም የሚሉት እኔም አይገባኝም። ሌላ ደሞ ስም ከናባት መጥራት። እነ ሰለሞን በላቸው፣ ዘላለም በዉነቱ ሁሉ ነበሩ ምናምን ማለት። እሱ አንኳን አሁን አሁን እኔም አየገባኝ ነው። እድሜ ሲገፋ ጭንቅላት በብዙ ሰዎች ስም ይጨናነቃል። ያባት ስም የዚህን ጊዜ ግድ ይላል። አያቶቻችንን አታያቸዉም። እነሱ ደሞ እስከናያት ሲጠራ ነው ትዝ የሚላቸው። ያቺ ያዛለች ልጅ ከባሏ አንኳን ተፋታ አስኮ የገባችው። እእእእ አስታወስኳት። የሷ ልጅ ነው ማሩን ያመጣልኝ

    ዌል እንገዴ እሱ መጋበዙ ነበር። አንተ የሱን ግብዣ ከታጠበ በግማሽ ሰዓት መድረቅ እንዳለበት ነጠላ ጠምዝዝህ ጠምዝዝህ ጠምዝዘህ ሌላ ነገር አረከው።

    ፈረንጅ ባል በስንት ጣእሙ። እንደ ከፋኝ ሲያይ ባሌ ቤቢ ይቅርታ አስቀፋሁሽ ብሎ አበባ ያመጣልኛል። የኢትዮጵያ ወንድ ቢሆን ኖሮ ዝምበይ ማድቤት ግቢና እራት ስሪ ነበር የሚለኝ። እንደዛ የምትል ዘመድ አለችኝ። ቪሌጅ ገርል ምናምን ስትል ብትሰማህ መውጫ እስኪጠፋህ ታፋጥጥህ ነበር።

    ሁሉንም ነገር የአዮዋው ወዳጄ ተናግሮ ጨርሶታል:: ግን አንዳንድ ነጥቦች ለማከል ያህል አስቴር ሽሮ ትወዳለች። ቃለ መጠይቅ አላት ትቦው ላይ እየው።

    Reply

    • tibebe
      Apr 24, 2016 @ 23:00:15

      ቱ! አዛለች ተፋታች?! ለነገሩ ባልየው ያገር ሂያጅ አለሌ ነገር ነው:: እሷም ብትሆን አለብላቢት ነገረኛ ናት:: ግን አስኮ, አገር ቂጥ?! ለመሆኑ ጥሩ ድንኳን ያለው ዕድር አገኘች?….

      My hypothesis for ስም ከነአባት ለመጥራት: ያኔ ልጆች እያለን ክፍል ስም የሚጠራው ለምዶብን:: Shout-outs to ፈቨን አዲስ: ክብርተሃና ግርማ; ሃድራ ተማም: መመኪያ ጋሻው… የወንዶቹ ስም ብዙም ትዝ አይለኝም😀 አንድ ጥላሁን “ካሜሮን” የሚባል ልጅ ነበር::

      የነጠላውን ምሳሌ አድንቄ ሳበቃ ጋባዥ እንጂ ተጋባዥ እንዳልነበርኩ ስገልጽልህ ከታላቅ ልቾ ጋር ነው😀 ደግሞ ለዘመድህ ስትልልኝ “ይሄ ምንም የማያውቁ እምቡጥ አበቦችን እየቆረጡ ለሴቶች መስዋዕት የማቅረብ ጎጂ ልማድ እስካሁን አልቀረም ወይ?”

      I don’t know, man. Village girls seems to be the way to go.

      Don’t believe when celebrities say ሽሮ እወዳለሁ ምናምን:: ሽሮ ይህን ቢሰማ “please, don’t patronize me” ይላቸው ነበር::

      Reply

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