They just won’t let you get your resveratrol on

So, I’m checking out at the store. Cashier asks me how old I was, because I was carrying wine. I say “old enough”. I was trying to be charming. But I guess she took offense. She asks for an ID: “if you had just told me your age…” She sees that my learner’s permit has expired (hey, don’t judge me! ምንም በቤቢ ፊያት ጊዜ ተለማምዶ እስካሁን መንጃ ፍቃድ ያልያዘ ሰው እኔ ብቻ ሳልሆን ባልቀርም, … my excuse: same as Eve’s verse on You Got Me “With all my classes I don’t have the time for life’s thrills”). She calls the manager. He goes “in the great state of so and so we don’t sell… that’s how the Founding Fathers intended it to be…”

They remove the bottle of wine from my stuff. አይኖቼ ተከተሉት…

Mofos!

I couldn’t even be flattered that she deemed it necessary to ascertain my age.

Then I come home to find out that Bill Maher is off tonight.

ቶታል ዲዛስተር አይ ቴል ያ!

On top of that, I can’t stop myself from going “really?!” (there may be a smirk there) whenever one of my students says they have found something to be difficult. Please, don’t you go ahead and be proud of me like ልጃችን ተስተምሮ ፈረንጅን “ሪሊ?!!” ማለት ዠመረ!! I am still clueless as shit. And that’s not good TA behavior. ለነገሩ many are the times when I would just throw whatever English word or phrase that I find lying around close by, just in the spirit of communication. Just because I say it, doesn’t mean that’s what I wanted to say.

በፓስፖርቴ መጠጥ እንዳልገዛ ደግሞ እማማ ኢትዮጵያን ማዋረድ ይሆናል:: It’s not good look.

ምን ይሻላል? Now I’m just sitting, blogging when I am supposed to be sipping. ዓርብ ያለወይን ግቡን ይመታ ይሆን?

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Rant: 1, 2, 3, go! ይብላኝ ላንቺና ለድርጅቱ እንጂ እኔማ መንገድ አላጣም:: ምን አይነቷ ጠማማ ናት በናታችሁ?! “I’m dealing with these fucking experiments, hearing ‘no, no, no’ all day long, then I come home and you won’t let me get my jam on up in here?!”

giphy

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ነጻ ምግብ, ቆሻሻ ልብስ, …

 

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The joys of free food from ማኔጅመንት ኢንስቲትዩት (ባህር ዳር) to የመፒ ስልጠናዎች (ጥቁር አንበሳ) to the neuroscience conference. This time we even were too busy doing our thing to attend the thing. የምግብ ሰዓት ሲደርስ ግን አይናችንን በጨው አጥበን ሄድን:: ነጻ ምግብ እንዳለ ጥቆማ ያደረሰን ወዳጃችን ሽንቱ ይለምልም! 🙂

20160917_185910

When one realizes that one kind of dressed like shit

taxGood mail to come home to

20160910_225937This has to be ፈረሰኛ , right?

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A day in the life

የዛሬ ዓመት አገሬ ከቤተሰቤ ጋር ነበርኩ:: ዛሬ ደግሞ ማንችስተር ዩናይትድ የተባለ ሸቃባ ሲሸነፍ ለማየት በጠዋት ተነሳሁ:: Got home from school at around 9:30 PM. የዛሬ ዓመት ያመጣሁትን ዶሮ በላሁ Interesting things happened to me during the day like E. coli splashing on my clothes and some even finding their way into my mouth (“along with some PMSF?!” –a realization that would come much later on). የሆነ ማሽን ማበላሸት አለማበላሸቴን እግዜር ይወቅ; I followed the operating instructions to a tee. I got to do only half of what I had planned for the day but still managed to run short of time and cancel my regularly scheduled workout; managed not to grade the exam papers, not to load the dishwasher. Tomorrow promises to be just as busy.

All this and yet, I feel like (know) that I’m not doing enough; I’m not thanking enough.

አዲሱን ዓመት የሰላም, የፍቅር እና የፍትህ ያርግልን, ወደተሻለች አገር ተመልሰን እንግባ ልል አልኩና opportunism እና ሌሎች ismኦች incitation እና ሌሎች ionኦች ይሆንብኛል ብዬ ሰግቼ ተውኩት::

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ካለፈው የተረፈ

  • የጎረቤቶቼ ጾታዊ ተራክቦ ድምፅም እንደሚናፍቀኝ ይጠበቃል:: The noise the guy used to make after whatever recreational drug –not so much.
  • Some of the stuff left behind by roommates:

crutches

Leaving it where it’s currently at is part of the roommate retention plan: “the place comes with crutches አያድርሰውና….”

drying sheets

One is reminded of one’s mom’s perfume. One wishes one were there to hug her on the morning of a holiday. In the short term, can hardly wait to use it one’s clothes.

  • I was surprised that Last Weekend Tonight and the Daily Show would use the same jokes that I had in mind Orange man wanting to put his Veep on domestic and foreign affairs; and the US winning the first gold medal of the Olympics, for shooting. የሕግ ያለህ! Plagiarism 🙂
  • A real case of plagiarism: one girl copied verbatim the “About me” part of my dating site profile. One of the different ways a person could like another person’s profile, I guess…The breach of etiquette was brought to my attention by a fellow prowler around said site.
  • It was comforting to hear a seasoned teacher admit that they get nervous before every new class
  • Modes of existence:

ድካም

  • I read two of አለማየሁ ገላጋይ’s books. I must say I have not enjoyed the great lengths the protagonist goes to ridicule the physical appearances of at least one character per book.
  • Although I’ve not been making strides into uncharted scientific territory, as much as I am supposed to, it was exciting to discover that ጌታያውቃል ግርማይ is the son of ሻለቃ ግርማይ ሃድጎ -songwriter to your favorite ጥላሁን song.
  • I believe Bethlehem Tilahun is a phenomenal woman. I also believe that she would inspire hundreds, if not thousands of Etyopian women. Silly observation: her name is like Bethlehem Wolde and Kalkidan Tilahun exchanging last names.
  • Ain’t nothing like a Saturday afternoon nap, facing the sunlight coming through the window blinds:

window

  • A fellow student from a third world country was telling me how outsiders used to be amazed about how peaceful the cities were even after dark, no robberies and stuff. The real reason, she explained, was that the sole rights and responsibilities for ሌብነት lay with the then dictator. Now, I may be straining the equivalence a bit. But I think it’s the same way that there rarely have been mass shootings committed by ordinary Etyopians. The government has always been responsible for that.
  • Caught some part of the opening ceremony of the Olympics in a Brazilian café. Their Bauru was a generous portion and ingredients so diverse as behooves a country that boasts the Amazon. And a Chinese place serves በጣም አሪፍ chicken በማረቆ በርበሬ ተከቦ:

First time I had the dish, I did the mistake of eating an approx 1:1 ratio of chicken:በርበሬ :: Next morning was so rough, that I was tempted to try the physically impossible (I wonder if it would be metaphysically possible) and blow on my ass. Second time, I did not learn from my past mistake -was even worse. ለምለሚቱ አገራችን, ኮስታራው ምግባችን,… ወዘተ are facing serious competition. My ass was humbled. በሌላ በኩል quinoa ain’t got shit on ቅንጬ ::

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